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Writer's picturemillie sutherland

Stubbs the Zombie review



The RTS raises from the dead for an unusual take on the genre- and on horror tropes in general.


Plot: 3




What if the USA poached the finest brains in Europe- admittedly, all Nazi brans- and by 1950, flying cars, robot butlers, laser guns and nuclear power are the norm? It would look a little like the Jetsons. Unfortunately, for the futristic Eutopia of Punchbowl, some this nuclear magic has seeped into the soil and the dead are back, baby, ready to suck those smart scientist brains straight from their skulls.

You control Stubbs as he chows down on the locals, turning them into a mindless hoard he can set upon the law enforcement and carry on numming.


Gameplay: 2


An RTS at heart, those on which you feast rise up and become part of the hoard, which you control in the back ground while you munch, fart and fight your way through a variety of locales. After catching sight of the Mayor’s wife on TV, the actions are loosely strung in a rom-com plot as you hunt for her.

Somewhat repetitive, your arsenal grows quickly at the beginning, sure- Stubbs sheds body parts like a leper’s strip tease- bowel grenades, fart bombs: you name it, he can peel it off and weaponize it. Come midway, he inevitably runs out of body parts, and the combat grows stale.

The game tries to mix things up.

The mid 2000s was full of this- throw in a novelty level to break up the action, lest we grow bored of the central mechanic and quit. Hence the dance battles, tank sections and shoot-em-up interludes.

This veritable pic-n-mix of gameplay has two down sides:

1) It dates it. Nowadays, the only games that employ this method are invariably doomed movie tie ins, better titles build on their core mechanics in a more diegetic manner.

2) You never quite adjust. You are just getting used to the RTS stylings, only for a cut scene to throw you into in Dance Dance revolution memory game ( Incidentally, I couldn’t complete it- 5 failed attempts later, even the game took pity and let me skip it) and throw you entirely.

Luckily, game-play is inconsistent, but the visual style permeates through out- an eerie Dolce Gusto.


Visuals: 3


You will hear this a lot. Stubbs is dated. The graphics have barely progressed from the Gamecube/ ps3 origina lin 2005. Not only that, but the plot- jocks, damsels in distress and vaguely rapey politicos- have a very “it was alright at the time” feel, as the game is set in an alternate reality 1950s. Meanwhile, the visuals take their cue from 1960s horror movies- night of the living dead with 20% less trowels to the head and 100% more tummy spaghetti. So it’s mid 2000s, poorly updated to late 2000s, set in the ‘50s, dressed as a ‘60’s horror flick. No wonder it doesn’t match the times very well. Indeed- it has a timeless feel as a result.

It’s actually spooky.

The mere fart of a Theremin. A hazy moonlit sky. Deserted streets. Neon glow. Stubbs knows all the creepy checks.The visuals are often dim and grainy, like an old black and white film, and that really adds to the ambience.

You might be the bad guy- the immortal undead- but you can still suffer a KO while chasing Nazis through a giant biome at midnight.


Audio: 4


The Theremin is all part of an authentic score- this could be any classic movie. The cut scenes are well voice acted if a tad hammy, though when you’re trying to parody the filmic equivalent of a pig farm, a little ham is unavoidable. The in-game soundbites grow repetitive ( if I hear another guard eulogise about his children shortly before I bite him a new neck hole, I’ll start seeking out the parents out of spite. It’s almost as bad as the Batman games- where you’re forced to hear a goon make plans for the future, promise to be a better daddy after this one job- as you fly from the sky and stomp his noggin in.)

The sound effects are overall great.

If I close my eyes, I can still hear the ‘clomp- clamp’ of your uneven shuffle reverberates from metal floors- scientists cower in fear. They’re all Nazis though, it’s fine.

Or is it?


Memabiblity 3


Mostly, the memes come from the news. Huge uproar at the time. This game encourages cannibalism. Does it? Does it?! Even shows like Hannibal glorify it more. Lecter makes flesh look delicious, sautéing brains, basting thighs with mint jus and Beaujolais- Stubbs doesn’t bother- brain straight out the packet is good enough for him. Plus no one idealises the guy! At best anaemic, at worst downright gangrenous, he is a shambling bumpkin in his old three piece suit, literally falling apart. Wario farts everywhere, but at least he looks healthy- Stubbs farts out his guts every 3 minutes and looks ready to collapse at any moment. You feel as though if he makes it to the end of this game, it will be by the skin of his teeth. His rotting, yellow teeth.

With politicians like Joe Lieberman criticising it an ‘cannibalistic’ the game garnered some bad press upon its first release, but Wideload game’s retort was as witty as the criticisms were dumb:


“Stubbs is a zombie. Thus the title "Stubbs the Zombie." Zombies eat brains. That's what they do. Stubbs cannot just saunter into the cafeteria and order a plate of freedom fries. He has to fight for his meals. In fact, actual cannibals only make it harder for Stubbs to eat, which is why this "cannibalism" story is insulting as well as injurious.


It's no surprise that the all-human media cartel resorts to distortions and name-calling; their anti-zombie bias has been evident for decades, and Stubbs is just the newest target…


A free mind is a tasty mind.” The soundbites and cut scenes are equally witty and there's a lot of humour to be garnered fro out of context screenshots if you want to freak a friend.


All in all memorable, if repetitive, imaginative, if flawed. Well worth a play, but not worth full price. It’s often on sale for a fiver on Steam. Wait for the price slash. Let Stubbs pay an arm and a leg.

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